Yesterday, at the grocery store, Will had the pooxplosion to end all pooxplosions. It was such a dramatic experience that I feel a need to document it.
Will was in the Baby Bjorn (of course), and I had just swiped my credit card at the register when I felt a suspicious drip, drip, drip on my feet. Will has been very constipated since starting solids, and had already had a big poop earlier in the day, so I was pretty sure we were in the clear for our late afternoon outing (sorry to give away all your secrets, little buddy).
At first I was confused about the yellow substance all over my shorts, legs, and shoes, but I soon grasped the enormity of the situation. Normally loaded with an infinite amount of wipes, yesterday I had three. This poop required about three hundred. I stuttered to the cashier something about my baby pooping and she kindly offered to help me clean up the mess until she actually saw it. That's when she got on the loud speaker and called a clean up crew over.
I profusely apologized to the line of people behind us for the pile of poop they were about to wade through while the rest of our groceries were rung up. It is very important to mention that those groceries consisted of ten jars of prunes, which happened to be on sale and are (were) a current staple in the little man's diet.
Here's the quick version of the rest of the story. Will and I run out of the store, I attempt to change him in the back seat of the car, his legs and chest are covered in poop, he takes his first car ride in only a diaper, and, ultimately, ends up in the bath tub. Only later do I address the issues of his clothes, my car, my clothes, my shoes, the Baby Bjorn, and, finally, the groceries.
And so, I'll repeat the question. Anyone need some prunes?
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